The last time I posted on February 26th, “The Lord Gave …,” I wrote about Job and the catastrophes he experienced as God let Satan test Job’s faith. Even though he lost all his children and earthly possessions, Job continued to trust God and his plans for him as he shared “the Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. May the name of the Lord be blessed.” Job 1:21.
A couple of chapters later in the Bible I found “finally, Job opened his lips and cursed the day of his birth. Job spoke up and said: May the day of my birth perish, and the night when it was said, “A child has been conceived.!” Job 3:1-3
As Job continued to experience the debilitating attacks of Satan, he began to doubt the very reason for living. Job had lost his children and possessions. Close behind came his body covered sores and a wife urging Job to “curse God and die.” His friends came to sympathize with him over all the tragedies in his life, but they could not even recognize Job because of the sores and grief he was experiencing.
It’s no wonder that I read “finally, Job opened his lips and cursed the day of his birth.” What I hear is total despair–no hope and no perceived relief–ever.
I don’t remember coming to a point that I grieved the day I was born. I know I have felt that it would be better to be in heaven rather than here on earth. I often think about actions and times in my life I wish had never happened. But to have never existed? That is another realm of grief and depression.
When I consider the idea of not ever being born, I see faces–my wife, my kids, grandchildren and great granddaughter, my parents and grandparents, siblings, and friends. I wonder what would be changed if I was never around. What would their marriages, families, and jobs look like? Would their personalities, strengths and weaknesses be the same? How many of my family members would have even been born? Knowing and loving them as I do, the thought makes me a little unsettled.
I’m not really sure why God put together my family the way he did. I can think of many others who would be a better son, husband, father, grandfather, or sibling than I am or ever will be. But I am told through the prophet Isaiah “Certainly my plans are not your plans, and your ways are not my ways, declares the Lord. Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways, and my plans are higher than your plans.” Isaiah 55:8-9. He is the Master Designer and never makes any mistakes. Can I really question his purposes by regretting I was ever born?
Beyond the groups of people I mentioned, I have had thousands of other contacts. There are phone calls, shopping trips, taking walks, events attended, my neighbors and more. And none of these were chance meetings. (The Isaiah passage above.) Actually, these are opportunities.
I am purposely placed here in my life by God to tell others about the eternity saving message of God’s love “for God so loved the world that he gave his only-begotten Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” John 3:16. It is a simple message. The Holy Spirit does the work of using those words to have people come to faith, but many times I fall short of doing anything to live that out.
“I don’t have the opportunity or time.” is one of my favorite excuses. Well, I have been alive for 67 years and a few months. If I take 20 years off my life to account for excuses like I am lazy or too afraid, or sick, or busy, or it is a holiday or I am too young, that still leaves me, to this point, with 17,155 days to share in some way about Jesus. Whether it is a direct message or by the way I walk or talk or help someone, it is a reason for me to be alive. As long as I am breathing, there is something that only I can do for God. When those tasks are completed, God will take me home. Again, can I regret my being alive?
I am not ignoring that situations like Job’s or depression can cause a person to wish they had never been born. The truth that God loves them and sent Jesus to save them seems beyond belief. But at the same time, God, the creator of everything there is or ever will be, also planned a way for these persons to find the help they need. And maybe I am here to be a part of that help.
Why was I ever born? God has plans and purposes that he planned just for me. I need to use my time here on earth to find them out. Thank you God!
Thanks for stopping by. I will post again about Job and his struggles. Hope you come back to read some more. I will wait you.
This song tells me that no matter how low I feel, even if I doubt my life’s purpose, God never stops loving me. As it says in Romans 8 “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor rulers, neither things present nor things to come, nor powerful forces, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”