I woke up this week to another Monday. I estimate in my life I have seen about 3,391 of these. And except for the ones I happened to have off, the first few minutes produce the same reaction, “So another week starts!”
Somewhere inside of me I know I just should not be feeling that way. I look at everything around me and I am aware it cannot be what the rest of the world feels. To me it is like picking up the 50 pound bags of dog food we buy and knowing the struggle I will have getting it into the house, down the stairs and to the basement. I know I will be successful, but I am not particularly looking forward to the struggle ahead.
And so I decided that when I retire–no Diane, not yet–it will be on a Monday. On that day I can get up and know it will be the last time I need to face that week ahead. My Monday blues will be gone. Or will it?
I know my life will not be over, well as far as I can tell anyway. If that is true, there will be good number of Mondays to which I will awake, along with the challenges I will find. I have known that for a while and yet I still convince myself each Monday I feel the same way as those in nursing homes do when it comes to an approaching Spring. I have read that the number of deaths increase as some of the residents realize another season is approaching and they just do not have the energy–so they give up.
O.K. Mondays are not quite like that, but I must be missing something if I think that retirement is going to change the way I feel about the beginning of the week. Actually, I started writing about my issue with Mondays a week ago. That Monday came and went without this being finished. I was unable to put enough thoughts together to come to any resolution about my feelings. And now I know why.
I could not see the message that God was trying to teach me. Wednesday came and some people broke into our house. It is only by the grace of God I happened to come home and upset their plans of the person. They were able to escape with some money, but from the items left by the door, the situation could have been a whole lot worse.
Then came Thursday and Friday with a slowly leaking tire on our car which eventually needed to be replaced. I just shook my head when I was told a tire, less than a year old, had nail and screw punctures so close to the rim that could not be patched. These two events along with some rough days at work brought a clear picture to me. It is not Mondays with which I have issues. it’s not even my sin and or the consequences of living in a sinful world.
My issue lies in the fact I know problems will come, but I am not trusting God enough to handle them. Sometimes I forget what Jesus said:
Or to be more accurate from Matthew 11:28, Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Evangelical Heritage Version (EHV). Worries and problems are part of this life. I will need to deal with them, but not by myself. My Savior, who gave up his life to pay for all of my sins, is always there offering his strength and problem-solving power.
And now to drill to the heart of the problem in my life–I am not spending enough time strengthening my faith so I can better deal with what I know is coming. I do not always trust Jesus with my problems because of my weak faith. King David, a man after God’s heart wrote Lord, in the morning you hear my voice. In the morning I lay out my requests in front of you, and I watch for your answer. Psalm 5:3 (EHV). I do not do that.
Martin Luther was quoted about facing a busy day, “I have so much to do that I shall spend the first three hours in prayer.” Three hours seems sooo long to spend in prayer, or two or one.
And then there is my wife whose spiritual life I have come to admire and envy. She begins each day spending at least an hour in prayer, and studying and memorizing the Bible. And her faith is a rock not only for her, but for me too. (I wonder if I have ever shared that with her.) That seems like so much work and self-discipline.
How many more examples can God put into my life before I realize the problem is not Mondays, or Wednesdays, or tires or even thugs who break into our home? My faith is the problem. And the only way to strengthen that is to spend more time with his Word. I need to change–again.
I may still retire on Monday. I will wait and see. But I know I cannot wait until I retire or even until Monday to start spending more regular time with my Savior. I need to begin something new in my life. And I can start by spending time each day exploring the Bible and praying, “Thank you, Jesus, for your life, your death, and all the blessings I have every day simply because you love me.”
Come on back and see how that works out. I will wait you.
Now here is a song that could be part of a perfect way to start my new way of beginning a day, a week, or maybe, even retirement.